Thursday, December 11, 2014

Pre- Newborn Post

If I'm being honest with you, I'm not scared to have this baby.  I know when I start feeling contractions again I'll have a freak out moment of "why would I put myself through this pain AGAIN".  But that kind of pain is temporary.

I am scared to have 3 kids.  As I near the end of this pregnancy, I'm realizing just how many shortcomings I have as a mother.  A lot of it, right now, has to do with how tired I am and how pathetic I feel.  But I'm going to be even more tired and more pathetic when this little guy gets here.  HOW IN THE WORLD AM I SUPPOSED TO RAISE 3 KIDS?!?  I grew up in a family of 6 kids... and I'm pretty sure my mom is either a wizard or has an identical twin sister.  HOW IN THE WORLD DID SHE DO IT?!?

I'm scared out of my mind but so excited.  We really felt like it was a good time to have another kid.  And I think Henry and Kate will bond even more with the arrival of this baby.  So, even though I cringe at the thought of more sleepless nights, those painful weeks of breastfeeding, diaper change after diaper change, and recovering from childbirth, I know it is going to be ok.  I am so lucky to be able to have 3 kids.  I can do it.  I can do hard things.  With the help of family, friends, and of course my Heavenly Father and Savior. 

For those of you that don't know, I'm in Arizona and I'm going to have the baby here (We're renting out our place in Cali).  It's nice to be surrounded by family, especially during the holidays.  There are some really nice perks when your husband is a student (4 week winter break!).  I'm due the 21st of December.  That means I have 10 days left.  But if you know my children... they like my womb.  So, I'm just planning on having this kid in 3 weeks. 

We spent Thanksgiving in Utah with the in-laws.  It snowed!  We love the snow.  It was so nice to see family, catch up, and get some date time with the hubby.  

Just thought I should write a little bit before I take the plunge into the 3 kid club.  Please pray for me!  Heaven knows I'm going to need it.  I'll post pictures when it happens :)

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Update of the last year?

Just kidding, I wouldn't do that to you guys.  How about our last trip we went on :)  Ok.  We always fly Southwest.  They have cheaper tickets, 2 free bags per person, and they usually let Henry say hi to the pilots.

We went to Arizona first for my sister, Ali's, wedding.  And guess what?  I only took 3 pictures.  Kicking myself now but it was a busy and fun week.  Something about seeing my dad sleep next to my son pulls at my heart strings.  Love these guys.

Grammy has a huge sink which makes a perfect little bathtub :)

These two leaving the reception... It makes me so happy to see my sister so happy.  It was a really great day to start off the rest of forever :)

Then we went to Cache Valley.  We went to Logan's Hero's sandwich shop.  I got the Rogers Sandwich!  It was actually pretty good :)

I got to meet my first niece, Eleanor, or "baby lella" as Kate says it.  She is probably the most well behaved and cutest little baby I've ever met.  

The boys went on a camping trip.  MT is exactly like his "Pa".  It's so fun to see them together.  Also, note how both MT and my father-in-law have iphone outlines on their pants.  Weirdos.

A photo from the camping trip :)  Sometimes I wonder what this little guy is going to be like when he grows up... and then I see pictures like this and I know he'll be just like his dad.  No shame in who he is, no sense of fashion, and incredibly funny!

A shot from my in-laws back yard.  Just makes me really really happy.

Meeting and holding baby Eleanor.  He was so enthralled with her and was so sweet.

This girl (Kate) was head over heals with baby Eleanor.  She loved her toes, fingers, nose, ears and eyes.  It was so precious to see her interact with her new cousin.  I have predictions they will be really great friends one day.

This is a little bit of a dream come true for me.  I want J Henry to love and appreciate his country/cowboy roots so badly.  He sat on the horse by himself while papa led him around.  I was one proud mom.

And this girl made it on for her first time too!  So much happy!

Waiting for the rain to fall :)

Tony Grove.  Beauty all around and the kids loved it.

Everyone was tuckered out.

Rides on the rhino!!!

JH loved it :)

Overall, Arizona and Utah were so much fun.  Thanks to families for making it a great time.  

Saturday, October 4, 2014

You know you are pregnant when...

  • people you don't even know-and even those you do- comment on your weight, size, and body shape without the slightest inclination of what they are actually saying.  (i.e. "You're getting big!"  "You're having a boy right?  I could tell because all the weight is in the front.")
  • you almost cry when you are talking to your daughter about not biting mom in the stomach... because it hurts.
  • Heart Freaking Burn- all the time.
  • that event you've had on your calendar for weeks and even updated the night before?  You miss it.  Why?  Because you forgot.
  • soda always sounds good.  Until after, when you get heart burn from it.
  • you become skilled at picking things up with your toes so you don't have to bend over.
  • you go from drinking water to almost peeing your pants in 2 minutes.
  • you are constantly trying not to throw up or gag.
  • tired is an understatement.
  • you're pretty sure your lung got readjusted by a roundhouse kick... because it's completely possible to readjust lungs people.
Don't worry, there are some good things too:
  • you don't have your period!
  • people generally try to be nicer to you (let you take their seats when there aren't any or offer to help lift things)
  •  you think you're saving money because you don't have to pay for birth control. (but actually you're spending more money on those ice cream bars)

Monday, January 6, 2014

Mr. Rogers... Duh.

My youngest sister, Emmee, and I were playing a game called Heads Up.  It's really fun, the game gives you a word and you have to describe it without saying the word and the other person guesses it.  I had to describe "Mr. Rogers".  I'm like, he lives in your neighborhood.  He sings "it's such a good feeling to know you're alive"(I sung it in the right tune too).  I give her some other obvious clues.  She stares at me blank faced.  The round ends.  I'm like, Mr. Rogers!  Duh.  AND SHE STILL DOESN'T KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.  My sister, Emmee Rogers, doesn't know who Mr. Rogers is!?!  We don't have any relation but how does any kid not know who Mr. Rogers is?  And now as a parent... he's pretty much the best guy ever.  He talks about how it's ok to be angry.  He talks about how your thoughts and feelings are yours and only yours.  He talks about how glad he is that you are different.  He talks about everyday things like buying shoes and listening to music and feeding fish and make believe.  He just plain rocks.  I'm just sad to know that the next generation of kids don't have Mr. Rogers.  Who tells them that it's ok to be who they are?  Who shows them how crayons are made?  The Disney Channel (I love Disney but that channel is not doing anyone favors)?  Nick Jr?  Parents are a good and big(est) influence but you've gotta have some back-up!  Please tell me there is another Mr. Rogers in this world...

Monday, December 30, 2013

Let's Just pretend it hasn't been over 3 months...

Guys, we are on our third round of sickness this winter.  THIRD!  I get being sick once, it happens.  But why has my and my children's bodies not learned to just keep the darn antibodies on guard at all times?  You get a week of "sweet everyone is feeling better" and then the fevers and runny noses and coughs start.  It's just annoying.

I ran my first half marathon a couple weeks ago.  It felt so great.  Especially since after Kate was born I started out barely being able to run a mile.  I had this little desire to run a marathon... and after the half marathon decided that I no longer have that desire.  I really admire those that do but it would take my body a long time to get to the point where it wouldn't break under that distance.  And I just don't like running that much.  I like running for about an hour then it's just not enjoyable after that. 

Henry is potty trained! Hallelujah (side note- I should really learn how to spell that word because I say it pretty frequently and always have to auto correct it).  It happened a week before his 3rd birthday.  Enough of his friends (mostly younger than him) had already been trained.  So, that peer pressure, the stars being aligned, my frustration with changing diapers- there's a difference between baby poop and real people poop.  He was pooping real people stuff and that's just nasty- and him finally being ready made it all happen.  He's mostly trained through the night too.  Whenever I let him drink water before he goes to bed I always regret it!  We still remind him to go often because he'd rather dance for 45 minutes trying to hold it then just go right away.  It's like, duh, if you go now you'll be more comfortable.  But he doesn't get it I guess.  Whatevs.  I'm just happy I don't have to change his diaper anymore!

MT has been plugging away at school.  He's still got a year left of classes and then a couple more years of research after that.  I know what your thinking, is he ever going to get out of school?  The answer is maybe.  ha.  MT is really really really good at school.  Approximately 500% better than I am.  He likes it too.  It's weird to think he'll be 30 when we're finally done but he'll have a Bachelors of Science, Master of Science, and a PhD under his belt.  Hopefully all this school will lead to a fulfilling job.  MT really wants to make a difference in the world.  To help people.  And I think he will.

Kate is still probably the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on.  Something about her long thick hair and that sweet chubby face makes her irresistible.  She'd probably be even cuter if I knew how to do her hair but that is a work in progress.  I can just hear her when she's 15 and looking at baby pictures, "Mom, what were you doing with my hair?  Did you ever comb it?  Was I abandoned?"  And that's when I'll teach her that I was busy building her character instead of doing her hair.  Oh man, I just thought of that line!  I really gotta remember that one. 

Speaking of hair, I have grey ones.  And it's pretty noticeable when I pull my hair back.  I'm 24 people.  I've never dyed my hair and don't want to start now (no time, energy, or money).  I'm just going to ride it out for a while and maybe it'll go away.

We had Thanksgiving in Utah and Christmas in Arizona this year.  We are so lucky to have the family we do- my family and my in-laws.  Seriously, I love spending time with them.  Maybe living away from family for the past 5 years has been a positive thing.  I don't take those most important for granted.  It's been a wonderful year (probably because last year at this time I was working full time, in school, pregnant, and exhausted). 

There's a quick update.  Now I can go into 2014 not feeling guilty! Hallelujia - see, I spell it wrong every time!

Friday, September 20, 2013

My Grandpa Rogers

My grandpa passed away on Sunday.  Him and my grandma were/are the biggest influences on our family and by family I mean my immediate family and my cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.  Of course, there is the fact that none of us would be here with out them... but its more than that.    My sister dressed up as my grandpa for Halloween once.  My grandpa would go to the "fathers and sons" camping outing as much as he could.  He went to all the sports events- as long as he wasn't in the hospital.  He was a legend, legacy, and patriarch that touched his children, their children (me), and their children's (my) children.  I grew up looking up to this man and didn't realize until later in life that not everyone has that.  I feel blessed to have known him.  Now, I don't mean to improperly describe him here.  He was probably the most inappropriate and loudest piece of country you'd ever come across.  Over the past little bit, he had some pretty low times and we thought we'd lose him.  I firmly believe that was him messing with the family.  That's just his personality.  Hey, look guys, get sad because I'm gonna die.  Oh wait, a week later I'm back to walking around and yelling at referees.  It's just how he was... He loved it.  And I loved him for it.  

During one of the "low" times I wrote down some of my favorite memories of him.  I want to share them here.  ***There will be swearing.  Grandpa wouldn't have it any other way.

-I told my Grandpa I was dating Morgan.  He asked to see a picture.  He looked and the only thing he said was, "Oh shit"

-Per tradition, he brought a shotgun to our wedding, and told Morgan he'd better take care of me or he'd hunt him down

-He was always singing, "She's got a freckle on her butt, she's pretty.  I watched her ass she turned the corner."

-He'd often say, "you look like you've been drinking muddy water" Never quite sure what that actually meant

-He was always yelling at sports games.  Even if he couldn't see a damn thing he'd be yelling "Clabberhead, get your eyes checked!"

-Once he heard Morgan's last name- Pope- he's only referred to him as 'Ol Poke.

-During my games, when it was quiet, he'd yell, "Sadi my lady!"

-Most everyday, him and my grandma would pick me up from half day kindergarten and we'd go straight to Taco Bell.  I'd get 2 double deckers and pinto and cheese

-I once was complaining about how hard volleyball practice was, he simply said, "Why don't you come suck my titty little baby."  I was scarred for life and learned to not complain around him ever again.  

-I wasn't present for this, but one time, he accidentally threw his keys in the dumpster and went in after them- he was like 80 years old and it was blazing hot in Arizona.  He got stuck.  Bahaha.  Every time I think about it I start laughing so hard.

-He'd always tell us about how a long time ago, when Arizona was mostly under water, him and Buffalo Bill Cody rowed around in a boat and painted the tops of the mountains- that's why you see all the cool layered colors on the mountains.

Oh man, I can think of a million more stories about him.  

He was the richest man I ever knew.  No, not rich in money.  He has 5 children, 30 grandchildren, and 44 great-grandchildren.  Every single one of us knew that man.  He supported us, told us dirty jokes, and loved us better than any other dad, grandpa, and great grandpa ever could.  

I miss you.  Thank you for raising our family with God's influence.  You're faith and love has guided so many to love God.  And thank you for teaching us that we'll all be together again.

Oh, and I must spread the message he told everyone.  


Saturday, September 14, 2013

Just be nice! (said in a whiny voice)

This post has been on mind for a while now.  These thoughts started during the Mitt Romney vs Barack Obama Presidential Campaign, developed more during the Gay Marriage disputes, and are continuing to develop as I read more into the "Mommy Wars" (breastfeeding v formula fed, working v stay at home, organic living and eating v non organic living and eating, etc) and the Mormon feminist movement.

I have a confession...  I really, a lot of the time, hate freedom of speech.  Cue gasp from everyone.  My husband loves it (maybe because he's very good at expressing himself through words), me, not so much.  I, of course, enjoy expressing my thoughts, views, and opinions freely but don't do it quite as eloquently as I'd like.  And most of the time, I'm interested to hear other people's thoughts as well.  It is the responses to my opinions and other peoples opinions that makes me cringe.  Am I making sense?

Example time.  Here are two statements that are controversial in nature but are generally the honest opinion of actual people. *Note- these are not necessarily my opinions

1. God loves all people and people should be able to love one another without judgement in regards to sexuality.  What harm does two married men do to a heterosexual couple?  Let people love and be loved.

2. Many believe you should be who you are and not try to conform.  But life is about change.  Changing from a natural state to a state greater than we can even imagine; a state God wants us to live by.

Honestly, the above statements both interest me.  I would love to have conversations with people who hold either of those thoughts (I understand there are more arguments for both "sides" of this issue).  While they may not be politically correct or completely unbiased, they both present their thoughts in pretty respectful ways.  These next statements is where my, "I hate freedom of speech" comes from. *Note- these are not my opinions but are based on actual posts and articles and blogs I have read.

1. Seriously, it's just not natural to have two girls together.  If people were meant to be homosexual then why can't they naturally have babies?  The crap that goes on in today's society is just sick.

2. So much for the "Christian" lifestyle.  People are narrow minded idiots to not support gay marriage.  Did we not already jump this hurdle with the civil rights movement?

Do you see the difference?  I know it's in language and how it's presented but often people start with a for-the-most-part respectful phrase and then get pounded with responses and replies that are borderline abuse. 

Why does everything have to be about taking sides?  With the whole thing in Syria- Obama's like, "let's take responsibility and show them that's not acceptable" and I hear a lot of people saying, "what the heck? That's the dumbest possible thing you can do."  I wonder if Obama would have been like, "sadly, there's nothing we can do about the events in Syria" if more people would say, "Why the heck aren't you doing anything about what's going on in Syria?!?"

I understand having differences in opinions.  I'm not saying that everyone should accept each others beliefs.  What I'm saying is, WHY DO WE HAVE TO BE SO MEAN???  I get it.  These are real issues that go deep into peoples hearts.  I know it's so important for your baby to be breastfed and I know it's so important for you as a woman to be equal to a man but do we really gain that much by generalizing, calling names, being overly sarcastic, and all that other stuff? 

I've been wanting- so badly- to post my views on who our president should be, on what we should be feeding our babies, whether I think women should hold the priesthood or wear pants or not, etc.  But I can't.  I get sick when I think of the backlash I'd get from the public, my friends, and probably family (not everyone but some).  I'm not ashamed of my beliefs.  If you ask me face to face I'll be honest.  But the things people are willing to say on a computer screen are not things I enjoy reading.  In essence, I actually don't hate freedom of speech.  But I do wish people would stop, think, and then respectfully respond to each other.

And I'm sure I've said things in here that a lot of people disagree with.  Let me guess what you're thinking, "It's my right to say what I want so get over yourself, Sadi"  "You're a coward for not posting your beliefs.  Be a big girl and stand up for what you believe." "Hey, you generalized and excluded me because I'm respectful when I post my thoughts".  I get it.

We can argue about anything.  There was this Dove commercial that was supposedly promoting self beauty.  I saw many postings saying, "Watch this, everyone is beautiful" and then I read other blogs and articles about how the whole thing is ridiculous and and there a racial biases and they are focusing on the wrong kind of beauty.  It's a video put on by a soap company!  Why do we have to analyze the heck of it?  Why do we have to watch a commercial to realize how beautiful we are?  Blah.

Why do we have to make such a big deal of one person's thoughts? 

I guess in a way it's good.  All this controversy keeps me on my toes and thinking about what I really believe.  I just wish I wouldn't get that "I wish I didn't read all those comments after that post/article/blog" feeling.  I do LOVE it when I read an uplifting article/post/blog.  Maybe I should just stop reading people's comments.

If you get anything from this post- Just be nice.

Ok.  I'm done.  You can go on with your lives.