If I'm being honest with you, I'm not scared to have this baby. I know when I start feeling contractions again I'll have a freak out moment of "why would I put myself through this pain AGAIN". But that kind of pain is temporary.
I am scared to have 3 kids. As I near the end of this pregnancy, I'm realizing just how many shortcomings I have as a mother. A lot of it, right now, has to do with how tired I am and how pathetic I feel. But I'm going to be even more tired and more pathetic when this little guy gets here. HOW IN THE WORLD AM I SUPPOSED TO RAISE 3 KIDS?!? I grew up in a family of 6 kids... and I'm pretty sure my mom is either a wizard or has an identical twin sister. HOW IN THE WORLD DID SHE DO IT?!?
I'm scared out of my mind but so excited. We really felt like it was a good time to have another kid. And I think Henry and Kate will bond even more with the arrival of this baby. So, even though I cringe at the thought of more sleepless nights, those painful weeks of breastfeeding, diaper change after diaper change, and recovering from childbirth, I know it is going to be ok. I am so lucky to be able to have 3 kids. I can do it. I can do hard things. With the help of family, friends, and of course my Heavenly Father and Savior.
For those of you that don't know, I'm in Arizona and I'm going to have the baby here (We're renting out our place in Cali). It's nice to be surrounded by family, especially during the holidays. There are some really nice perks when your husband is a student (4 week winter break!). I'm due the 21st of December. That means I have 10 days left. But if you know my children... they like my womb. So, I'm just planning on having this kid in 3 weeks.
We spent Thanksgiving in Utah with the in-laws. It snowed! We love the snow. It was so nice to see family, catch up, and get some date time with the hubby.
Just thought I should write a little bit before I take the plunge into the 3 kid club. Please pray for me! Heaven knows I'm going to need it. I'll post pictures when it happens :)
Sunday, October 5, 2014
Just kidding, I wouldn't do that to you guys. How about our last trip we went on :) Ok. We always fly Southwest. They have cheaper tickets, 2 free bags per person, and they usually let Henry say hi to the pilots.
We went to Arizona first for my sister, Ali's, wedding. And guess what? I only took 3 pictures. Kicking myself now but it was a busy and fun week. Something about seeing my dad sleep next to my son pulls at my heart strings. Love these guys.
Grammy has a huge sink which makes a perfect little bathtub :)
These two leaving the reception... It makes me so happy to see my sister so happy. It was a really great day to start off the rest of forever :)
Then we went to Cache Valley. We went to Logan's Hero's sandwich shop. I got the Rogers Sandwich! It was actually pretty good :)
I got to meet my first niece, Eleanor, or "baby lella" as Kate says it. She is probably the most well behaved and cutest little baby I've ever met.
The boys went on a camping trip. MT is exactly like his "Pa". It's so fun to see them together. Also, note how both MT and my father-in-law have iphone outlines on their pants. Weirdos.
A photo from the camping trip :) Sometimes I wonder what this little guy is going to be like when he grows up... and then I see pictures like this and I know he'll be just like his dad. No shame in who he is, no sense of fashion, and incredibly funny!
A shot from my in-laws back yard. Just makes me really really happy.
Meeting and holding baby Eleanor. He was so enthralled with her and was so sweet.
This girl (Kate) was head over heals with baby Eleanor. She loved her toes, fingers, nose, ears and eyes. It was so precious to see her interact with her new cousin. I have predictions they will be really great friends one day.
This is a little bit of a dream come true for me. I want J Henry to love and appreciate his country/cowboy roots so badly. He sat on the horse by himself while papa led him around. I was one proud mom.
And this girl made it on for her first time too! So much happy!
Waiting for the rain to fall :)
Tony Grove. Beauty all around and the kids loved it.
Everyone was tuckered out.
Rides on the rhino!!!
JH loved it :)
Overall, Arizona and Utah were so much fun. Thanks to families for making it a great time.
Saturday, October 4, 2014
- people you don't even know-and even those you do- comment on your weight, size, and body shape without the slightest inclination of what they are actually saying. (i.e. "You're getting big!" "You're having a boy right? I could tell because all the weight is in the front.")
- you almost cry when you are talking to your daughter about not biting mom in the stomach... because it hurts.
- Heart Freaking Burn- all the time.
- that event you've had on your calendar for weeks and even updated the night before? You miss it. Why? Because you forgot.
- soda always sounds good. Until after, when you get heart burn from it.
- you become skilled at picking things up with your toes so you don't have to bend over.
- you go from drinking water to almost peeing your pants in 2 minutes.
- you are constantly trying not to throw up or gag.
- tired is an understatement.
- you're pretty sure your lung got readjusted by a roundhouse kick... because it's completely possible to readjust lungs people.
- you don't have your period!
- people generally try to be nicer to you (let you take their seats when there aren't any or offer to help lift things)
- you think you're saving money because you don't have to pay for birth control. (but actually you're spending more money on those ice cream bars)
Monday, January 6, 2014
My youngest sister, Emmee, and I were playing a game called Heads Up. It's really fun, the game gives you a word and you have to describe it without saying the word and the other person guesses it. I had to describe "Mr. Rogers". I'm like, he lives in your neighborhood. He sings "it's such a good feeling to know you're alive"(I sung it in the right tune too). I give her some other obvious clues. She stares at me blank faced. The round ends. I'm like, Mr. Rogers! Duh. AND SHE STILL DOESN'T KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. My sister, Emmee Rogers, doesn't know who Mr. Rogers is!?! We don't have any relation but how does any kid not know who Mr. Rogers is? And now as a parent... he's pretty much the best guy ever. He talks about how it's ok to be angry. He talks about how your thoughts and feelings are yours and only yours. He talks about how glad he is that you are different. He talks about everyday things like buying shoes and listening to music and feeding fish and make believe. He just plain rocks. I'm just sad to know that the next generation of kids don't have Mr. Rogers. Who tells them that it's ok to be who they are? Who shows them how crayons are made? The Disney Channel (I love Disney but that channel is not doing anyone favors)? Nick Jr? Parents are a good and big(est) influence but you've gotta have some back-up! Please tell me there is another Mr. Rogers in this world...